Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Ergophobia, PTSD, and Memory Loss

Some counselors have observed that I might have a form of workplace PTSD. I have witnessed violence and threats of violence in the workplace. However traumatic that may have been, I feel more traumatized by the day-to-day experiences of office work: office politics, lack of freedom, lack of opportunities for growth and self-expression, rude co-workers, demeaning bosses, deadening boredom, and the like.

I had a startling experience today. At a medical appointment for a routine procedure, the nurse recognized me. It turned out she had worked for me when I was a call center supervisor, which was about 17 years ago. She remembered my son, how old he was, and other details.

I did not remember her at all.

I looked at her name tag and that didn't even help. I didn't tell her that I had absolutely no memory of her whatsoever. That would have seemed rude. So, I just smiled and made conversation.

Leaving the medical office, I felt totally shocked. Why have I lost these memories? Is this normal in any way? Worries about early-onset dementia crossed my mind.

I believe this is a symptom of my workplace phobia and a form of PTSD.

I think it would be to my advantage to find a therapist who can help with this specific type of problem.


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