There Might Be Some Jobs I Might Like

Recently I've been trying to open my mind to the fact that there could possibly be some forms of paid work in the world that would not make me sick. Right now I am at the point where I am willing to believe that such workplaces might exist.

I have not yet convinced myself of the likelihood of: 1) finding these places, and 2) becoming employed by these places. I'm going to work on that.

Part of this process is for me to clearly identify what doesn't work/what to avoid, and then to determine what types of work might be suitable.

I'd like to break this down by types of business or organization to which I am attracted (or at the very least, not averse), conditions that absolutely cannot exist in a prospective workplace, and envision what I would like to see. I'm going to brainstorm these lists right now:

Environments I Might Like

Arts and crafts related
Organic foods/gardening
College/University
Alternative health: naturopath, acupuncture, etc
Pet related: Doggie daycare, dog walking, pet supplies, etc.
Social services/nonprofits
Hippie shop
Bookstore
Antique store

Deal-breakers & Unacceptable (for me) Working Conditions

Lots of office politics
High stress environment
Fast pace/many deadlines/time pressures
Micromanagement/critical supervision
Pressure to perform
Inflexible procedures
Excessive performance evaluation
Excessive work load
Lack of control over work
Call centers
Corporate cubicle farms
Any company that exploits workers (here or overseas)
Adversarial employee/management relations
Hierarchical organization
Constant monitoring
Lack of ability to take restroom breaks as needed
Discriminatory environment (sexism, racism, homophobia & other forms)
Cliqueish co-workers
Jerks and Dumbasses (occasional Bozo or Doofus OK)

What I'd Like To See

Collaborative organizational style
Respect for all
Fun, happy environment
Creativity
People are allowed to make a mistake/perfection is not expected
Everyone is valued
Diverse people
Atmosphere of ongoing learning
Low pressure

Anxiety Over Volunteering in an Office

I have been volunteering at an animal shelter for the past eight months, working directly with dogs. The shelter needed help in the office with data entry and telephone work, so I volunteered for this.

Now, keep in mind that I've been volunteering there for several months, and I walk past the office area every day that I'm there. It hadn't bothered me at all. I look forward to going to the shelter, and pretty much enjoy every minute I spend there. In fact, it's one of the most fun things I've ever done in my life.

The night before I was going to work in the office, I started feeling weird. I was thinking I wouldn't like it, and thinking that the people in the office probably wouldn't like me. I was worried that maybe I wouldn't be able to do the job anyway, and then maybe I wouldn't like volunteering at the shelter any more.

The next day, I woke up really early and paced around my house nervously. I was worried about every damn thing, whether my clothes were OK, whether I would be able to learn things and remember them, whether I would say the right things, etc., etc. I felt ridiculous about the silly things that I was obsessing about. I sure hoped nobody would notice how nervous I was.

Well, I've done this assignment twice now, for four hours at a stretch, and as far as I know, nothing went wrong. I even got complimented on my performance (I hate that word "performance" in relation to work. Maybe I should think of a different word.)

Yesterday at the shelter office, there a few things that gave me anxious feelings. First of all, the supervisor was wearing a suit to work that day. He usually doesn't, so perhaps he was going somewhere special that day. For all I know, it could have even been a funeral or something. Evidently business suits trigger anxiety in me.

Then, he wanted to introduce me to his boss, who works in a corner office. That made me feel ill at ease too. He seemed like a nice enough person.

This whole experience has made me very aware of my strong desire to be free from these specific types of anxiety, since they are obviously interfering with things I want to do.

Work or Volunteer Positions That I Liked

Looking back over my life, were there any types of work (paid or unpaid), that I mostly enjoyed? Here's the list:
- Working for two underground/alternative newspapers in the 70's- I wrote articles and poetry, and did layout/pasteup
- Cleaning hotel rooms. I liked the fact that I could think about whatever I wanted to while I was working, and it was good exercise.
- Being a Resource Assistant at the Women's Studies Union at the University when I was 18.

The next one is 30 years later....
- Volunteering at the Emergency Food Program. I planted and maintained the vegetable garden to provide produce for people in need.

And then.....
-Volunteering at the Humane Society. They let me hang out with the animals any time I want. I'm there about 3 or 4 days each week. Sometimes even more.

I'm not afraid of dogs.

I also like to proofread term papers and essays for my friend who is from Japan; she's in an MFA program, and the papers she writes are fascinating: art history, comparative cultures, social issues, and other interesting topics.